Episode 227: American Idol, autism and anti-bullying advocacy – with Adin Boyer

The episode transcript is below.

Carolyn Kiel: Before we get started with today’s episode, I’d like to give a big grateful shout-out to thecrafthouserabbit, a Beyond 6 Seconds listener who recently supported my podcast on my Buy Me a Coffee website! This listener bought the equivalent of 5 coffees and also wrote a very lovely note that says: “Thanks so much for such interesting interviews and discussions. I look forward to listening when I see you’ve recorded a new episode. Wishing you all the best for 2025.” Thank you thecrafthouserabbit for listening and supporting my podcast – this is such a kind and encouraging way to start the new year! If you’d like to support this podcast too, check out BuyMeACoffee.com/beyond6seconds – you can also find the link in the show notes of this episode.

Welcome to Beyond 6 Seconds, the podcast that goes beyond the six second first impression to share the extraordinary stories of neurodivergent people. I’m your host, Carolyn Kiel.

On today’s episode, I’m speaking with Adin Boyer. From his classical piano, choir, opera, music theory, and musical comedy beginnings in suburban South Orange County, California, to his massive solo and full band indie rock performances, Adin’s no stranger to living a life fully devoted to music and discovering himself entirely through music.

He gained widespread international notoriety as a contestant on season 21 of American Idol, where he advanced to the top 55 and received major accolades from Lionel Richie, Katy Perry, Luke Bryan, songwriting mentor Philip Phillips, and ultimately his biggest musical inspiration, Chris Martin from Coldplay.

Adin also solidified his stance as a fierce advocate for neurodiversity affirmation and anti bullying. Adin’s released two EPs and is currently on his largest to date solo tour across the country. Adin, welcome to the podcast.

Adin Boyer: Thank you, Carolyn, for having me.

Carolyn Kiel: Yeah, I’m really excited to talk with you and learn about your story as a musician, and as a musician with autism.

So I guess, starting out, how did you discover that you had autism? Did you get diagnosed at an early age?

Adin Boyer: So I feel like my story when it comes to figuring out that I’m on the spectrum and learning what to do with that information is a bit different than most people I’ve spoken to.

I was diagnosed very early at age 2. In many ways, I was the stereotypical autistic child. You know, I didn’t mask or anything like that. I just was very noticeably disabled. So I was diagnosed at age 2 and this is the early 2000s when the paradigm of autism was so dramatically different.

I always knew that I was different from other people. I was doing all these classes and having these aids surrounding me growing up in elementary school. And I did pick up on the fact that I, and only like a couple other people, were doing these. And then I officially was told by my family, around age 12, that I was on the spectrum.

And a lot of people, when they find out they’re on the spectrum, I’ve found, you know, especially activists who discuss it online and many who are diagnosed much later within the past five years or so when the paradigm has been how it was, have expressed a sense of major relief and major satisfaction and closure. And that was the complete opposite of how it was for me. My family told me I had autism and I was like, well, crap. And thus spiraled into a large tornado of internalized ableism. I began to really, really hate myself for who I was.

At the same time though, I’m glad they told me when they did, given the time period that I was living in. If I was 12 years old today, I would have wished they would have told me way earlier, but back at the time, I wasn’t mature enough to truly understand autism, and nor was the rest of the world, it seems. So, I don’t have any regrets for when I was told.

But it did culminate in a major mental health crisis when I was about 14, where I was having daily meltdowns and I was weaponizing the label to get away with things. And, around when I was 15, I began to slowly but surely start accepting it, and doing stuff fueled by my desire to help other people in the autism community. And, I’m very, very happy with, how the trajectory has, has gone. But it definitely was not a typical one based off of the information that I gather from what I’ve seen from others on the internet.

Carolyn Kiel: Yeah. It’s interesting how people have different reactions to finding out that they’re on the spectrum and it probably depends on, you know, when they grew up and how old they were. And yeah, because as you said, over the past few decades, just society’s understanding of autism and what it is and what people on the spectrum are like and can be like and are capable of has just changed and transformed. So yeah, it depends on so many different things. Absolutely.

Yeah. And you mentioned school and being like surrounded by aides who were helping you. What was your experience like in school and especially with your other classmates?

Adin Boyer: It was tough. It was very tough. I also think my path in school was also a little unique as well, especially once I hit middle school. So I went to your average neighborhood public elementary school. I was in mainstream education because I was, you know, still passing enough to be in a mainstream setting, but I had no friends. I did make a friend in third grade, and he was probably likely also on the spectrum. He introduced me to Pokemon, and that was pretty much all we did together with the occasional shooting basketball. I didn’t really understand the mechanics of a friendship. I was like, okay, I’m gonna make a friend because that’s what everyone else seems to be doing, and that’s what people say that I should be doing. And so, he was definitely a very positive memory in my life, but it was just him. And I wasn’t really fulfilled.

I was still a kid, but I also didn’t know even still how friendship really, truly worked. So it was, it was tough. I didn’t realize how badly bullied I was until I got to middle school. I was called names constantly, especially the R word. I would have items thrown at me. I would often be the scapegoat, I feel like for a lot of things. I was constantly misunderstood by teachers.

For example, I had one teacher that often thought that I was deliberately not listening, and that couldn’t have been further from the truth. It was my processing delay. I was begging her, “no, I am! I’m trying my best!” And she just wouldn’t understand. I was humiliated by another teacher of that same grade that I didn’t even have, in front of the whole student body, which led to a massive uptick in bullying around fifth grade. And, especially like in my later elementary school years, the bullying, as I was slowly starting to become more aware of, you know, people’s intentions, was really becoming brutal.

And so, once I hit middle school, I got the opportunity of a lifetime. I got the opportunity to attend Performing Arts Joint Middle and High School, which I credit so much for my development in so many ways. The Orange County School of the Arts, OSHA. I auditioned for the school. I got into the Classical Voice program as a boy soprano, still. And I got there and I was still getting ignored quite a bit, but it was a fresh start, and I wasn’t getting overtly bullied. I was still getting excluded, I was still getting ignored, but I wasn’t getting overtly bullied. People weren’t going out of their way to say mean things to me just to fuel their ego. It made all the difference and it gave me the space to grow and to flourish into the best person that I can be.

Took me a few years. As I said, I was in seventh grade. I had just gotten into that school when I found out I had autism. And then once I got to my freshman year of high school, I went through my massive mental health crisis. I was so stressed out about academics as well. I got the lowest grades I’d ever gotten. But once I hit about 10th grade and I think finally near to the end of puberty, I began to become a lot more self actualized than I had been prior, and a lot more happy than I had been prior, and a lot more motivated and a lot more successful with making friends than I had been prior. I began to make some friendships, that actually felt like real friendships, around I’d say 10th or 11th grade.

Between my 11th and 12th grade year, I went to Interlochen Arts Camp, which is a highly prestigious arts summer program. And I did the two week program instead of the six week program for the singer songwriter division. And my life absolutely changed from that moment on. I began to really understand what friendship and community and love outside of my immediate family felt like. I began to understand that. And my senior year, I was on top of the world and I had a blast.

And I’m very grateful, you know, for the friend I made in third grade and then another friend that I had made in middle school for just being there for me. And, you know in the time that, that it was, and helping me get to where I am today. I’m still grateful for both of them. And I have, credit them a lot with you know, my path toward connection with people. And I think that it would have been harder to, to make the close friends I have if it weren’t for those people and getting exposed to the concept of friendship early on.

And I can’t even begin to tell you how grateful I am for the lack of overt bullying in middle and high school, and how much it made me grow. I’m still working through a lot of trauma from elementary school. I know it still hits me from day to day and I get really down on myself and it’s really affected my self esteem and I still have very large sums of internalized ableism that I deal with, but I’m happier now than I’ve ever been. I’m more self actualized than I’ve ever been. I’m more mature than I’ve ever been too. But I look back and I still feel like I’m one of the luckiest people in the world, especially with how I went through school.

Carolyn Kiel: Wow. To hear you say that you’re grateful for the relative lack of bullying in middle and high school is, is something to sit with.

And I think it, unfortunately, you know, a lot of young autistic people who have their school experiences very fresh in their mind often do talk about being bullied whether, and not just by students, but by teachers as well. So it’s it’s just horrible that that is common. You know, you figure sometimes you can give kids a pass and they don’t know better, but adults should know better.

So it’s just really tough to, to hear that. And and I imagine that fuels your anti bullying speeches and advocacy today.

Adin Boyer: And I, I do think that, you know, those teachers who misunderstood me were also in many ways, products of their time, products of their environment. Mind you, this is the early 2000s. Doesn’t make it acceptable, but, but still it’s something to, you know, keep in mind.

And I hold out hope that they have become much more understanding just as we all have in terms of autism over time.

Carolyn Kiel: In terms of making friendships, was it easier having a common interest with people? I mean, that’s been easier for me. Like most of my friends have been other musicians or other podcasters. So was that a factor in kind of helping you to form more friendships in middle and high school?

Adin Boyer: Absolutely. Because it was the School for Performing Arts, we’re all very artsy. And, ultimately, that’s how my parents fell in love with each other, because they’re both super duper artsy themselves. And I found that I tend to connect with people who are artsy.

And You know, it made all the difference, in terms of the options I had for making friends.

Carolyn Kiel: Having things in common like that really can be very helpful, yeah.

Adin Boyer: It really was for me, yeah.

Carolyn Kiel: For me as well, so, yeah, totally.

So you’ve been involved in music like since you were very young because I think your parents are musicians as well. So like how did you get started in your early years, and what were your first instruments, or was it singing, or how did that evolve?

Adin Boyer: Yeah so my mom’s not a musician but she’s a former stage actress and my dad is a musician trombone player middle school band director. And so naturally I was always involved in music my entire life. You know, my dad always says he played trombone for me when I was in the womb. You know, the sounds of the trombone throughout my household still play in my head over and over, even, even here in this hotel hundreds of miles away.

But, I was classically trained in music and I started taking piano lessons around the age of five. I was singing a lot to myself and I enjoyed singing as well, just kind of naturally. And so I was involved with a boy’s choir where I sang soprano one, very high, starting at age eight, another opportunity where I got to be surrounded by a bunch of people. You know, there were some rude people, but I didn’t see them often enough to say I was getting like bullied. But I did begin to, you know, I have more opportunities to connect with people there.

I’m super grateful that I had these opportunities to connect with peers, neurotypical or not, you know? Just in general for me, it was what I needed, drastically. With that and, you know, building the bridge between playing video games during breaks, I still just had a blast up on stage singing with the group and doing piano recitals for piano related activities and doing competitions and just sitting down and dedicating time toward getting out the music in me and expressing myself. And at the time, it was through other composers and what they had written. And I have so much respect for my classical background and my classical training and my music theory training. And it absolutely paved the way for what I do now and how I interpret the music that I currently create today.

And, I was doing classical piano all throughout high school. Granted around that pivotal age of age 12, I also discovered Coldplay, and that’s when my life absolutely changed, because deep down, I knew that that was the kind of music that I needed to make to fulfill my deepest desires creatively.

So, slowly but surely I was doing classical stuff and then I got to college. I was studying film scoring and then I was always doing like, you know, singer songwriter stuff kind of on the side starting in my mid teen years. But then once I got to, like later college which is when COVID hit, that’s when I decided I was going to go full throttle with doing singer songwriter work, releasing music, really, really honing in on my vocal chops.

And it’s been a beautiful trajectory. It’s been an absolutely beautiful trajectory. I’m endlessly grateful for my piano training, my piano teachers, and my voice teachers, and being involved in the All American Boys Chorus. Shout out to them. And, and just the classical world that I was in was just a beautiful experience that I look back at with great fondness and was a beautiful, you know, at the time seen as like recreational activity for me which was once again, what I really needed. So I’m so grateful for all that I have been through in my musical training.

Carolyn Kiel: Yeah, it sounds like a really strong, solid foundation to have that classical training and especially having piano as an instrument is just extraordinary because, you know, you can accompany yourself, you can compose and song write, and yeah, really, you have so much flexibility in the styles of music that you play. So yeah, that’s, that’s really awesome.

You recently, on season 21, auditioned for and were on American Idol. Now, did that come like right after college or were you still in college? And what was your process for deciding to go for American Idol?

Adin Boyer: So it was a few months after I graduated when I got on American Idol. And, Idol was a beautiful experience that I have absolutely no regrets for whatsoever. No qualms with anybody about at all. However, it was not something that I decided. I was actually cast for American Idol on two separate occasions by two separate people.

The first time it happened was when I was in my final semester of college. And it was the fall of 2021. And I had been street performing on Santa Monica promenade. I got an email from somebody that said that she was a casting director for American idol. And, you know, of course I didn’t fully believe it at first, but I looked into it and I was like, okay, this is legit. But I never watched American Idol growing up. I never really cared about that sort of thing. I mean, yeah, I did kind of watch The Voice a little bit with my mom, like, in my early teen years, but I didn’t really watch a lot of those talent shows or anything like that. And also, I had a lot of preconceived notions, many of which are still true, about reality shows really skewing the truth and not being totally reality shows.

So I was worried, you know, because I was, you know, very, very aware that people have the ability to take advantage of a lot of people in my position. And so I just also didn’t want to take that path down the talent show route. I thought that it wouldn’t be an organic means of growth for some reason. And so I said no the first time.

Then fast forward to, to summer of 2022, I got a Instagram DM. I had somewhat of a, you know, kind of a niche micro celebrity type presence on social media for my TikTok videos a couple of years prior and you know, other things I was involved with, collaborations and whatnot. So I was found by yet another casting director from American Idol and he reached out to me and he said the same thing. And I was like, okay, how many casting directors are there? There’s got to be like, at least 100, right? Like just going all over the country, just scouting out people, just saying all these things. And I looked online and I only saw 10. So I had to like, be like, okay, let me back up for a moment. If two out of 10 people, that’s a fifth, that’s 20%, find me, reach out to me, and think that I would be a good fit for the show, this might be something that, that could be worthwhile.

So, at that point I had finished college, I was just about to start my new teaching job, and I was just trying to grow my career in whatever means necessary, and I was also confident enough that I could be unapologetically myself and not worry if they weren’t gonna air me. Because, you know, they want certain people to look a certain way. And if I didn’t look that way, it didn’t matter. I was there for the experience. I had many opportunities to meet new people. I got to travel. I mean, what’s not to want, right?

So, I went and auditioned. And honestly, I wasn’t taking it seriously, like, very seriously. Because, you know, I didn’t have a strong desire to really be on the show. I didn’t really care, you know, at the time. And that also made me feel very guilty. Because I was like, okay, there are also some people out there that have dedicated their whole lives to being the next American Idol. And I’m over here, like I was, I was guilty. I felt like I was taking the place of somebody. And I was like, well, but you know, these are actual casting directors, casting actual people. And I, I suppose I have a pretty unique voice musically and, you know, story wise. So I figured, you know, Hey, it might be something to offer.

Got to the audition and I sang my song and then I advanced and then at that point I was like, Oh, so, so it’s real now. And so Hollywood week, that was when I can truly say I went all in on just dedicating my time to American Idol and really, really pursuing it and really, really, really trying to make it as far as I could in the competition.

So, yeah, it’s definitely a path that not a lot of people expect, especially since I never watched Idol. I never really was a, you know, big fan of those reality shows or anything like that. I just kind of ended up in that situation, and I took advantage of it. And I don’t feel like I’ve taken away any places or anything. And I feel like I was completely valued. And I felt like my needs were met as well, especially during Hollywood Week. Because I was the only non minor who had his mom with him. You know, all the minors there, under 18, legally had to have their parents or guardians with them. But for us, it was not allowed. But I was able to request my mom to come with me as a disability accommodation and it made all the difference. Because I just needed a second brain to process everything that was going on and to help me out. And I think they were as accommodating as they could have possibly been given the situation and given the cards that they had, you know?

It’s really unpredictable, you know, when you’re filming something so large scale and you have so many, many logistics, it’s hard to have a completely set in stone schedule for something like that. So it was a means for me to definitely practice a lot of that and being in that kind of environment where there’s not a set schedule. And it was definitely a practice for working under pressure situations as well. And I think with my mom there and with them being cognizant of my needs, I think that for the most part, it was executed very appropriately.

And like I said, I have no qualms. I’m very grateful for how they treated me. I definitely worry, you know, about other people, whether they’re on the spectrum or not, or neurodivergent or not, who try out for, for this show. But like I said, I feel like I’m like one of the luckiest people in the world. And it turned out to be one of the best things I ever did.

Carolyn Kiel: That’s great. That’s great that they gave you that accommodation to have your mom there because yeah, that’s so important. And yeah, with reality shows, like you never know. Like, as someone from the outside who’s never been involved with one, like I have no, I have no idea what really goes on, what gets edited out or what gets edited together. You have no idea what the, the situation’s really like, but that’s good that they were accommodating.

Adin Boyer: It was good. And it was, it was pretty accurate portrayal, too. Like, I can confidently say that I was portrayed accurately. The only things that were inaccurate were literally just omitting certain things that I said. Not, like, twisting or rephrasing the things I said. It was literally just omitting certain details. But you know, everything I said or things I said impromptu, and they were there and they were real and you know, it worked out great. So.

Carolyn Kiel: That’s good. So how did that experience influence you, you know, one as a musician and two as, as an advocate for anti bullying?

Adin Boyer: Yeah, American Idol absolutely changed my life for sure. And it definitely influenced me as a musician and advocate. You know, it was, it was a beautiful adventure and it was another world. We were all kind of in our bubble, especially, you know, for Hollywood Week, I felt like we were there for like two weeks in this extremely nice hotel in the middle of downtown LA. And we were barely leaving and we were there just with a bunch of people. It was, it was truly another world, like another society. And it was just so unique and it was such an amazing adventure. And I just looked forward to it every morning. And I was also running on a lot of adrenaline and a lot of like physical sensations that I was not feeling before due to the, you know, kind of stress that it was. There was so much excitement, so much anticipation.

And, I definitely kept to myself a lot, especially during Hollywood Week. I think I might’ve been one of the shyest people there, which is interesting because I don’t necessarily consider myself a shy person. I’d say I’m like equally as outgoing as I am reserved. I’m equally as introverted as I am extroverted. But over there, I just really, really kept to myself, especially in the beginning, because of how different I felt from these people. Like, I felt like I had more in common with just people from my immediate area, like in Orange County or LA than anyone on the show because of, you know, one, my classical background, which no one had, my ability to read music, which not a lot of people had, my ability to, you know, determine any pitch out of the air, you know, whatnot.

So I was keeping to myself a lot, until I had a girl come up to me, her name is Rachel, who was on the show. She was not aired, and she did get eliminated very quickly. But, she turned out to be the greatest friend that I’ve ever made in my life. And, she is someone that I am so endlessly grateful for, who takes all of her energy to allocate it to talk to me, at whatever point she can. Given the situation, the crazy situation she’s in. She works off the grid. She’s like doing like land surveying right now. And she’s often in places where she doesn’t have service, but when she gets service, she always makes time to text me or contact me. And, and it’s just something that definitely changed my life equally as much, if not more than American Idol was meeting her and having her come up to me. It’s like she immediately understood me and it just, it made all the difference. And, it really influenced me as, as someone who was just trying to learn the capabilities of human kindness and it made all the difference in that realm for sure, because she’s the nicest person I’ve ever met in my life.

And, you know, she got eliminated, and then scary things happened, and I, you know, had a meltdown, and was pretty traumatized, you know, being the only one left without a partner. That was definitely something that is a core memory throughout my life. One of the scariest things I’ve ever experienced for sure, you know, for the world to see. But I was already so vulnerable and there was so much overwhelmed. I was already there. I was in too deep. I was left with no choice, but ultimately with a desire to be a massive advocate on that show. The adrenaline and the tension was just a big motivation to just serve my community and just keep it real with people and be as authentic as I could and just try to reach people with my authenticity. And it was really, really pivotal in getting my message as an advocate to a much larger audience.

And, you know, even to this day, although music’s my expertise a lot more so than just autism in general and autism advocacy, I still find that I tend to reach more people with autism content instead of music, which kind of blows my mind. But, you know, as long as I can help somebody with whatever capacity, with whatever life experience that I have, and, you know, connect with new people and then I’m happy, you know. That influenced me as an advocate because of the real authenticity of the experience on the show, and looking back on it, recognizing that we’re more alike than different, I’d say.

And the biggest way that Idol influenced me as a musician was that it really pushed me to hone in on my vocal chops. Like I said, being classically trained, my background was very unusual for, you know, an idol contestant or anyone that I was on my season with, you know, especially since piano was my first love. I’m a classically trained pianist firsthand. I was doing piano competitions and I was a pianist before I was a singer, you know, and I was doing all that first.

The way that it really influenced me musician wise was it really made me more motivated to hone in on vocal chops and it made me fall in love even more with singing. You know, after hearing some of these people and just some of the incredible capabilities with their voice, it really, really motivated me. It was, the judge’s biggest reason for eliminating me was that my vocal chops were not matching up to the rest of my musicianship, and that my vocal chops were not as strong as the group that I was in. So I really, really have been motivated to really, really hone in on practicing singing the past couple years. And I think it’s slowly but surely starting to pay off. Yeah. It’s influenced me big time as a musician and advocate.

Carolyn Kiel: Yeah. There’s so many things in there. It’s amazing what kind of a profound difference one person at a time can make in your life. Like your one friend that you met in third grade and your friend, Rachel, that you met on Idol. And that probably ties into like anti bullying in itself is that you have the power as a single person to choose to be kind or to choose to, you know, like send a message to, to people, you know, when you have cell service, send a meme, send a note. So just tell people you’re thinking about them. It means so much. And I think we don’t realize that.

Adin Boyer: Yeah. I had another friend from Idol who I was speaking to a lot later in the process when I began to open up more, reach out to me and just said, “Hey, I’m thinking about you. You really helped me on my time on Idol and I just really appreciate you.” and I just, that made all the difference.

I did a show in Fresno. My friends from the Flutie Foundation in Boston who live in Fresno came out to see me perform. They said they were going to go and then they actually went, they committed and they came and had a blast hanging out with them. Met a new friend of theirs.

You know, it’s been very fulfilling, you know, my experience with friends and making new friends and connecting with new people. And I’m just so honored to have people in my life who care and who at least try to understand.

Carolyn Kiel: And I’m so curious just as, as a musician, although I haven’t toured in a very long time, but I remember the mini tours that I would do and, and just how, you know, you’re in a new place, you’re out of your routine. Like things go wrong. You’re exhausted all the time. Like, and you’re touring now, like you’re doing tours, multiple tours around the state and the nation. How do you manage your energy when you’re out of your normal routine and potentially in an exhausting situation?

Adin Boyer: I’m out of my normal routine, but I make a routine. I have to have a very, very strong itinerary that I make for my tours. I have a system, a very strong, firm system that I’ve established when it comes to my driving capabilities, my singing capabilities. And a lot of it I’ve learned the hard way, you know, especially on my first leg of tour. I had three gigs in a row where I was contracted to play three hours each and I was terrified. And so I switched it down to two hours for those first two gigs in a row. Then I got to my third gig and I just was, I couldn’t hang. I was so exhausted and, I barely even made it past 45 minutes of performing and my voice was sore and I was so tired.

So with that, I created a system that I have currently established for myself and my current needs. And it recognizes that I’m not Taylor Swift. I can’t perform for those outrageously long periods of time right now. It would be nice to get to that point, but, you know, self care is important too.

So my system I’ve established is that I only perform for up to two hours at gigs, and I never do more than two days in a row of gigs. And I learned that the hard way. Like for example today is my day off. I did a filming session yesterday that required a lot of singing and then a gig two days ago. And now I have, since today was my day off, I have a gig tomorrow, which is a private gig and then I have a gig on Thursday, and then I have a couple days off after that. So it’s, it’s a lot of just trying to stick to that system as much as possible.

A lot of venues that I play at, which are usually like breweries, wineries, restaurants, dive bars, have a three hour performance system and they will insist on playing three hours. And so I was like, okay, well, what if we compromised somehow? What if I performed for a two and a half hour slot, but took two 15 minute breaks in the middle? Because for a lot of these sets, people do take breaks. I don’t. I just go straight through. I don’t. I’m not really a fan of taking breaks when I’m playing because I like to keep my momentum going, you know, unless I absolutely have to use the bathroom, which is often the case. But, I did that and it worked out great.

And, you know, sometimes I’ll offer even less money for it. And it’s a lot of negotiating and, you know, interacting with strangers, and it’s very difficult, and sending a bunch of emails to even get to that point is difficult in and of itself. But when I’m actually there, it’s, it’s a lot easier than what I’m sending the emails, you know?

I also recognize that I require lots of sleep, like a very large amount of sleep. I have to get at least eight hours every night. Otherwise, I will struggle to function. Like I genuinely cannot function at a certain part of the day. Like for example, if I, if I get five hours of sleep. I’ll be fine for the first few hours of the day, but then once I get to like 2:30 or 3 P.M. I just I absolutely just crumble and lose my ability to function. So I need lots of sleep. I always try and put that in and if I can’t get lots of sleep before a gig, I don’t do it, you know? I don’t do it, and it’s okay if I lose more money. It’s just as long as I’m, you know, making some degree of money to offset my hotel costs, you know?

And when it comes to driving to new places, I never drive more than 6 hours at a time. So anything over 6 hours, I don’t drive. On gig days. I never drive more than 4 and a half hours at a time. So, like, for example, if I have a gig in one place the night before, but then the next day I have a gig in a place that’s four and a half hours away, I can drive four and a half hours there, get to the hotel, take a little nap, then go do the gig, especially if it’s at nighttime. I can do that. But you know, those are my limits. And I usually just drive about four, four and a half hours every time anyway, whether I have a gig or not, or up to that amount of, you know, time. And also, you know, most hotels, checkout times are 11:00 AM and most hotel check-in times are 3:00 PM. So that’s a four hour window where I can just check out, get on the road, then boom, get there right at check-in time. You know, so it, it, it, it, it checks out. Pun not intended, or maybe.

And it’s therapeutic to, you know, drive and be out there on the road. But I also have to acknowledge that it’s still work. I had to, you know, do a lot of, you know, planning in that realm as well. As far as, you know, making stops or, you know, sometimes I won’t get just about eight hours of sleep. So I’ll still leave a bit early, you know, and then I’ll go and pull over to a rest area, take a half hour cat nap, then get back on the road again. You know, which I, which I do frequently as well.

So it’s a system, it’s a system and it’s having an itinerary and having a to do list and keeping myself as occupied as possible, knowing what I am doing at every waking moment. So that makes all the difference.

Carolyn Kiel: Well, that’s awesome. Knowing yourself and knowing your limits and what you’re capable of and, you know, and I’m sure learning that through trial and error and then building that system. Because I think a lot of people feel the outside pressure and are maybe afraid to, you know, give themselves accommodations or they’re just too hard on themselves and, and I think, you know, once you get to a certain point, it’s like, no, I know what works for me and I’m not afraid to say what makes me feel supported and what helps me perform. And I think it’s really important and just for something for people to keep in mind if they’re struggling with things that they’re trying to do that they love to do. That’s one cool thing about being an adult is that you’re not in school. You’re not under other people’s rules and other people’s things. It’s like, no, I can now make my life and make adjustments as I need to. So that’s good to know.

In terms of your anti bullying messages, I know we talked about how you got inspired by that and how American Idol really fueled that desire to be more of an advocate. And I know you do a lot of public speaking now. What are the main messages that you try to get across to your audiences around anti bullying?

Adin Boyer: I talk about the space that the lack of overt bullying and acceptance gave me to flourish, which I did mention earlier. And I relate with my own personal experience and it helps me realize that we’re more alike than different. I know that there’s people out there that are like me. And even just going out and doing youth speaking in Wisconsin and having a bunch of people come up to me after who are open about their neurodivergence or feeling different for whatever reason. And just knowing that I can reach people, you know, makes all the difference.

The way I got started was becoming more accepting of myself. After my big crisis at age 14, I started a club. I started an autism awareness club at school and that led me to be pretty passionate about autism advocacy and anti bullying, learning more about it, feeling confident enough to connect with people and be myself. And I credit that with the start of just being an advocate.

As far as speaking, one day my voice teacher called me to do an assembly on it at her son’s school. And I just really enjoyed it. I really enjoyed reaching a bunch of people and I started to do it more and more and went down a rabbit hole of, you know, the side hustles of youth motivational speaking. And, you know, and a lot of these people are doing, you know, other amazing things too, and they use that to attribute it to their, you know, youth speaking. And, I just think that it was a really, really amazing thing to see at the height of COVID and, the motivational speaking idea really, really motivated me to motivationally speak.

So, you know, I credit that one assembly that I did as being the start. I then even did one at my old elementary school with one of my teachers that I actually liked. And, it was a lot of fun. It was just a lot of fun. I found I was reaching a lot more people. I feel like I can connect with kids a lot easier sometimes than, you know, peers and adults, because, you know, they’re not as likely going to, you know, bully me or ridicule me because I’m much older than them and I have that experience now.

So it’s, it’s really, really nice and it really, really seemed to make a positive difference. And so I credit those with being the starts toward being an advocate and just trying to make the world a better place.

And also at the time of my club, you know, autism was still fairly well unknown in many ways. And so I was very motivated with my unique experience in that particular group of people at the time. And I just thought, Oh man, this is like unique. I could hook some people on to something pretty unique. And so it was a lot of that.

Carolyn Kiel: Very cool. Yeah. Well, it sounds like you’re having an incredible impact both musically and on people’s lives, like, you know, all aspects of their lives and, and help, really helping people navigate those really difficult times of your life when, when you’re young and, and different in some way. And just helping to raise that awareness of that we are more alike than different. Yeah, absolutely.

Adin Boyer: Absolutely.

Carolyn Kiel: Yeah.

Adin Boyer: Big message.

Carolyn Kiel: Well, Adin how can people get in touch with you if they want to see you perform, or if they want to hire you to speak at their school or somewhere else?

Adin Boyer: Absolutely. Since we were just talking about youth speaking, I do have a Google Form on my website, AdinBoyer.com, where you can find pretty much everything I do business wise, as far as music marketing and youth speaking and advocacy work. You can email me at Adinboyer at gmail. com. Pretty straightforward.

If you’re interested in getting in touch with me for whatever reason, particularly business inquiry related stuff or collaborating with an organization or whatever, send me an email. I’ve gotten involved with some amazing projects across the country through my email and through my Instagram DM even and through the speaking tab on my website. That’s how I got to go to Wisconsin. And I check that frequently and I’m always up for new fun opportunities to travel and reach new people. That I would have never anticipated reaching. And I just love traveling too. So I’m very motivated by that too.

And as I mentioned, I have Instagram. It’s at AdinBoyer, no dots, no underscores at A D I N B O Y E R. I’m the most active on there out of all my social medias. I mainly just cross post to TikTok and Facebook. And I have some longer videos on YouTube but mostly I’m active on Instagram and you can find the same stuff on TikTok and Facebook mostly, but Instagram has it all.

Check out my website, Adinboyer. com. Find me on social media at Adin Boyer. And I’d love to get in touch about any fun opportunities. I do a lot of things. I’ve, I’ve played gigs at trampoline parks through through a volunteer situation. I’ve done some very, very outlandish things. I’ve played keyboard on the back of a moving truck for my city’s 4th of July parade. I, you know, I, like any opportunities to just play music and reach people hit me up and I’ll get back to you with a rate and we’ll discuss some fun ideas that we can bounce off of each other.

Carolyn Kiel: Fantastic. I’ll put your website and your Instagram link in the show notes so people can access it easily from there.

Adin Boyer: Of course, I forgot to mention if you wanna see a show of mine, follow me on Instagram. But I have all the details for my shows on BandsInTown, BandsInTown.com. So if you look at the website or social media, whatever you call it, BandsInTown. You’ll find all the details for all of my upcoming shows, but I advertise it like crazy on Instagram and all the details are on BandsInTown for the venues.

And most of the venues I play at currently are free because they’re just restaurants, bars, mainly cause I get contracted to do, you know, background music usually. But so usually I’ll have like one or two people showing up who know me from somewhere, usually Idol. But, I’d love to get more people coming out to some shows. So hit me up, come see a show, get involved. Maybe I can make a difference in your life.

Carolyn Kiel: Is there anything else you’d like our listeners to know or anything else they can help or support you with? As we close out here today?

Adin Boyer: Come to my shows, hire me, I’ll go anywhere. Thank you again. And I’m just so honored and thankful for my experience, and I’m glad that I can help some people out. And I hope that whoever is watching this has a wonderful day. And if you’re not, at least you know that I support you and Carolyn supports you and we care about you.

Carolyn Kiel: Thank you. Thank you Adin for sharing your story on my show. It was great meeting you and talking with you.

Adin Boyer: Of course, Carolyn. Thank you for having me.

Carolyn Kiel: Thanks for listening to Beyond 6 Seconds. Please help me spread the word about this podcast. Share it with a friend, give it a shout out on your social media, or write a review on Apple Podcasts or your favorite podcast player. You can find all of my episodes and sign up for my free newsletter at Beyond6seconds.net. Until next time.